Not in Scotland

Not in Scotland. Our government loves us so much, cares for our health so deeply that we are unable to drive if we have had a lager shandy (an inch of lager in a pint glass topped up with lemonade) even upon the next day. They allow us to have deep fried mars bars in batter. But never a wee whisky to halt the chill. I often forget that Scotland is so cold. Our government keeps us warm. They keep the chill away. They know what is best for us and look after us. Shielding us from the rain and snow. I have the brolly of the SNP shielding me from truth at all times. We (the people of Scotland), are never smart enough to make decisions for ourselves. stupid as we are. Our government make sure that we are warm and cosseted ( apart from the old people that die each year from the cold) they ensure that our diet is mediterranean as that will help us live longer. Yet still we live in Scotland, a sliver from the arctic circle, a long way from the Med. We try to survive another cold and inhospitable winter in the way we always have. Day by day, night after night, our own way to survive another winter, Nicola and her henchmen know us better than we know ourselves. I think that they forget, whilst trying to do good, that we live in Scotland. A cold Northern land. In their heated parliament, in their warm, large homes, In their Jaguars, lexus or Range Rovers they forget, coddled in warmth, just how tough life in Scotland can be.